Mom Talk: How Much Advice Is Too Much?
What do you do when people tell you how to raise your kids?
Moms Talk returns today on New Baltimore-Chesterfield Patch, part of an effort on our site to reach out to moms and families.
We invite you and your circle of friends to help build a network of support for parents right here.
Each week in Moms Talk, our Moms Council of experts and smart moms will be here to take your questions, give advice and share solutions.
Moms Talk will also be the place to drop in for a chat about the latest parenting hot topic. Please join in the conversation!
Today's topic: How do you deal with other people—such as relatives or close friends—telling you how to raise your kids? What about strangers giving advice, in stores or restaurants, for example? What do you think? What do you do?
Moms will be online to chat, so feel free to add your thoughts in the comment box below.
Rebecca Wyatt Thomas
1:25 pm on Wednesday, February 16, 2011
I think it's hard to take advice when the advice is 15 years old and comes from someone who doesn't know my child very well.
Heidi Bitsoli
1:42 pm on Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Do you ever get advice from people who don't have kids? I don't have any but I wouldn't tell someone how to parent.
Rebecca Wyatt Thomas
1:52 pm on Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Oh I have. My favorite was when a childless person told me my breastfed baby wasn't getting enough to eat. Steam built up in my head as I tried not to explode.
Christina
2:05 pm on Wednesday, February 16, 2011
The majority of the UNSOLICITED advice I get is from my mother, whose child-rearing skills haven't been updated since the late 70s/early 80s when we were babies! She means well, but I can tell she gets upset when I tell her that new studies have shown X...in rebuttal to her advice!
Rebecca Konarz
2:59 pm on Wednesday, February 16, 2011
I think the majority of advice I get is from my mother too, who by now, after number 3, has learned it is better to not give advice! :-) I did get comments on breastfeeding. Also, I taught all my children how to use sign language at a young age one volunteer at church (in her 60s I am sure) told me that teaching kids sign "definitely" halts verbal language...I did inform her of the studies however I am not sure it changed her opinion ... I think it was easier to "judge" mothers prior to having children, I remember thinking, "I will never let my kids eat a bag of opened cheetos before paying for them at the grocery store".....BUT now, I say what do you want, what can we open, what will tide you over to get this awful trip complete! haha You have to take the advice with a grain of salt, however I do think women who may not feel confident in mothering can be seriously injured by others advice --let us remember this when WE have grandbabies!
Jennifer West
6:58 am on Thursday, February 17, 2011
I have a 9 year old and a 16 year and I still receive unsolicited advice and I'm sure I give some as well from time to time. For the most part it's harmless and doesn't bother me, but there are cases where it gets to me. I'd have to say the advice I get saying I'm too strict bothers me the most because it's usually coming from parents whose children get in trouble at school or who aren't always respectful. I find myself always fighting the urge to defend my parenting but as I get older I do that less and less. I know I'm not the perfect parent and neither are the people giving the advice, we are all just doing the best we can.